Well, I'm back in my apartment after a week with my family. The visitation/memorial/not a funeral was easier than I expected. Lots of people came by, saying nice things - as one would expect. Of course, the gambling addict/manager of the family store was acting like he was part of the family (um, no). He brought his wife and daughter, who had a look on her face like she was either a disaffected teenager or constipated. You take your pick.
It was certainly an interesting setup, though, with people showing their class stripes. A few people sent in food that the family didn't really get a chance to eat. All sorts of random people lounged around the family lounge at the funeral home, stuffing their faces. Then, when I tried to grab a platter of sweets, my diabetic aunt 'volunteered' to take them (and some non-edibles which DID make it home) to the car and not so shockingly, they didn't make it. I mean, it was just as well, but I mean, really? Who does that. Oh, and apparently, there is no dress code for memorial services. We went from suits to shorts/t-shirts to streetwalker (one of my cousin's kids).
My sister and I did as much as we could for our mom while we were on bereavement leave. We waited for the weather to cool down and Friday, we went about cleaning out the closet, which our dad had commandeered. Since we were giving most of the clothes to Goodwill, I had to look in all the pockets to make sure there wasn't any money or anything important. Somehow, the ew factor of finding two different condoms in suit pockets didn't detur me (though, as my mom's tubes have been tied since my birth, it did provide further evidence of him being a bad husband), but disposing of a father's porn stash isn't exactly a normal activity. After we bagged up the closet (and started taking everything to goodwill & dumpsters), it looked like a completely different place. My mom finally has somewhere to hand her clothes and store Christmas stuff. Along with that, my sister completely changed the bedspread and moved the tv so that our mom could sleep in what felt like a different room.
One random thing is my ex-sister-in-law's presence. She's a pathological liar and horrible human being, and we're wondering what her angle is. I mean, she's spent the last fifteen years making my brother's life miserable, but for the past week, she's come around with the ol "call me if I can help" routine. She was acting friendly, commenting on how my sister and I looked different (than we did 15 years ago). If she knew how much my mom loathed her, she... nah, she'd probably still come around, thinking that she was a good enough con artist to overcome such things as that.
Anyway, though my dad did try to get a lot of stuff set up for my mom, I really wish he would have sold his business once his health started to go downhill. At this point, it's the main stress left for my mom. We have some crooked employees, including the manager who steals from the business. Once she can get rid of it, she can go visit family and destress. I don't care if the buyer razes the place to the ground.